Feeling....Fresh

Wo today sleep till 12 haha so long never try sleep till 12 in the noon time liao. Last night after church we to Lao pa sai to eat supper with alex and sze wei then went to bugis to play billard till 1 then they came to my house and slack till 2 pluse. So long never se them liao so is a good time for us to talk man. At first I was meeting christine for dinner but at last i was caught up by something there cannot make it.

Yesterday when to loyang for a meeting I was paying very attention for the whole meeting but there nothing for me and just as i slide track for a few sec looking at some other thing, pang one question shoot at me where i didnt even hear it. so I need to apologies and ask him to replied again wa my client was there too lor sian give him a bad impression of me.

Stupid all my boss and manager just push the meeting to me I am not the one who take care of the place lor but cos nobody wanted to go so they just push to me. Only know who to push job to me why dont push more pay to me right.

kana suan by my contractor cos i sent him a email ask him to finish some job by 30 sept but I typing error so i worte 30 aug, then he shoot me back by saying that he cannot do it cos now is sept and he cannot do back date one.

Late will be going to jenefier birthday party at east coast so will be meet ann, eric and mona 6 at parkway BK to buy present lor.

I will be leaving home at 5.30 so now still continue slack

The blessing of the Lord brings wealth,
and he adds no trouble to it.
Proverbs 10:22

Feeling....Pain and Sick

Soooo long never update. what should I wirte??? I have been good at my job thank God never face much trouble, all my colleague and boss are good to me haha. Life working at airport police HQ is fun cos all the poeople there is treating me very nice. So everyday working here is easy, fun but yet sometime very boring cos there is not much or I can say no challenge in work. Everyday like doing the same thing lor and worst news is that there is no increment in pay after confirmation sian right. Everyday I need to find something to do and that is the worst part sometime really nothing to do yet still need to act till very busy infront of my big boss if not then my boss will be in deep shit. I really dont understand what can I learn from this job cos all the thing that I must know I all really knew it liao lor. Not like in school where I can face alot of different problem everyday and I need to solve it and by solving it I learn alot man. It also give me the push in life and that is what I need now A PUSH.... something that will drive me on.

I found out that life style begin to change from bore to very bore till now no life man.

Poly life so fun even duo study is hard but I still can enjoy myself.
Army life was tough but I still got all my camp buddy to share and have fun with.
Work life was slack yet boring cos after work also dont know do what.

See during Ploy and army , I got very little time to spent yet I feel that I am having a fun life, now I got all the time to spent yet I am not happy. So is it good to have more time to spent...

Now I felt that I am just living to see the next day sunlight, is meaningless... I felt so empty in my heart or can I say that I am lost in my life seeking a way out, seaching for a new meaning to live on. I felt like a zombi just that I got feeling.

Infront of poeple I am happy and laught but alone who know...

I tense to hate wasting time but now I am wasting time every hour, min, and sec cos I am doing nothing that can contribute to my life. Doing nothing is a wast of time.

what am I writing now.

sometime I felt like leaving singapore to another place and start all over again.
Work, understand and have fun at the place then move to another place and start all over again.
But I cant, maybe I dont dare or maybe I can got too much burden here which I cannot let go.

Now I am living in a lifestyle which is not I want but what can I do.....

I am benson I should not be living in this kind of lifestyle.

I wanted to do something great in my life but I need an opportunity to show what I can DO!!!

when you read this, you might think that hey who do you think you are but I believe that I am the best.

My pastor say before that you might not need to know everything but you must at least know something that you are best in. as for me the thing that I am best in is BEING MYSELF.

I always believe that how talented a man can be but without an opprtunity to show his capability then everything is useless.

let stop here.... I spent alot of time to get this flash anim up but it is not done my me la, hope you like it

woo now is 12.01 in the noon, after a 2 hour workout now is time to bath and go to work hehe.

Now is 5 pm, I am back from work. Nothing much to do today, when to airport wait for the michelle but she fly me aorplane again the 4 time sian nevermind since I am the one who need here help. Sinceshe cannot make it so I walk around to inspect the building found out that there is cob web on the both side of the door, talk to cleaner to clean it and also found out that the urine thing spolit so wait for the simon to come a fix it and talk cock with him.

Tomorrow will be going to office to do some paper then meet vincent to go JB shop shop.

Wa my both hand now is so sore cos today morning do some workout now feel it liao :(
no strenght to type anymore...

Though I walk in the midist of trouble,
you preserve my life, O Lord.
Psalm 138:7

Feeling...sad

I am so good today cos I stay in my office since 9am till 4pm doing all the paper work. checking through all the invoice and create proformar. Looking at number for the whole day lor.

Then went to find alson and vincent to play billard, play 2 games and I lost both. I should win but also dont know what happened bad luck man.

I want to watch garfield dvd lor bye bye

Feeling.... Whole body pain

Wa so long never update, siao must try to daliy update my blog from tomorrow. Why my whole body pain is because on monday I join the safra mega gym. Everyday from Mon to thur, I will go to gym at 3, doing running for 4 km and carry some weight. Cos my hand still not that strong so I can only carry very light. Remeber that last time chest press I could lift up like 40kg per side now haha on 10 make me feel like want to die liao. So weak man therefor I try to use more machine weight then free weight. From tomorrow onward I will follow a 90 day guide in body training. After all the work out I will relax in the jacusie pool and let the hot water flow through my body feel so good man.

Work was fine, didnt face much problem even got problem thank god everything are manage to solve. Tomorrow need to do alot of paper work sian cos my manager rush me.

Still the same, I still feel that I am lacking on something just dont know what is it. Everday work then go gym then either go out with friend or go home or go to church. This cycle seem to be too boring, will this kind of cycle stay forever this thing kept on going in my mind again and again. I need to fix my aim:

1) pass my class 3 on the 5th of NOV then buy a car.
2) Study on the professional cert in facilities management from NOV till MAR.
3) look of a course in deg to study in next year.
4) looking for a better job with higher pay (now my gross pay is like $1900 only)
5) buy a dvdrw in oct
6) buy my pen in oct
7) buy my rolex end of this year
8) buy my Home theater system for my room in oct

Am I asking too much???

Yap one more I need a holiday!!!! bangkok, malaysia, hong kong or tokyo also can!!!

my gym